Don’t give me your sweet-lipped words, your promises that fall empty as soon as you leave the room. Don’t give me sugar-coated thoughts formed through a text message late at night. Don’t give me what you think I want, emotions calculated and misconstrued. Don’t give me actions that speak of love but hold no weight when the morning comes.
I’m not chasing a connection that only lasts for the moment, a bond that’s temporary, with hidden agendas and no intention to keep.
I don’t want a person who’s only here in the now, but has no plans to stay. I don’t want anyone who stands there pretending to be someone else, speaking as though genuine, but every word is thick with lies.
Authenticity is everything to me.
I want to feel the truth as it leaves your mouth. I want to know you’re not just sitting with me because it feels good in the moment, but that you are intrigued by the thoughts in my head and equally excited to share your own.
I want to listen to the way you form syllables, be captivated by every sound that escapes from your lips. I want to hear what makes you passionate, what makes you scared, what makes you want to keep chasing the sunrise, what wakes you up and pushes you forward into a new day.
I want to hear what’s beyond your surface—maybe who and what has let you down, maybe all the times you’ve fallen and how you somehow kept going, maybe the one thing that defines you, and you never want to lose.
I’m not afraid of being too much, of getting too close, of uncovering parts of you that you’re tried to keep hidden. I’m not afraid to show you my scars, to stand before you in my emotional nakedness, letting you learn who I am and what makes me, me.
This life is filled with white screens and telephone lines and while you’ll never see me turn my back on those beautiful, technological things, I crave something deeper. I want to go beyond a pixelated face, a string of text on a white background with a beep to let me know you’re there.
I want to let your words fill the space between us. I want to hear, and touch, and feel everything you have to say.
I want the authentic you—beyond what separates us. I want to see you dance, and laugh, and swear, and cry, and share secrets because then I know you’re here with me. Then I know this matters. Then I know it’s real.
Don’t give me lip service. Don’t give me excuses as to why you can’t, you won’t, you’re just not ready. Don’t act like what you’re searching for is a little less, a little removed, a little piece when you could have an entire whole.
There’s more to this life then chasing temporary.
So be authentic.
Give me yourself so that I can love every part of you, so that I can stand beside you when the storms come, so that we can make meaning of this life, even when it hurts.
Be real about what you think so that we can bounce ideas off of one another, so that we can push each other’s limits, so that we can learn and grow. Because honestly, what else is there?
You don’t have to put up a mask, a front, a façade because you’re afraid I won’t accept you for who you are. Listen, we all have demons and battles and bullsh*t. Listen, I don’t care what you’ve gone through; I care about who you are.
Listen, you’re not the only one who’s afraid. But are you going to spend the rest of your life in fear?
Or are you going to say, “I’m here. I’m in. I’m real. Let’s do this.” Are you going to be yourself around me? Are you going to quit fighting and just lay your imperfection out for the world to see?
I hope you do.
I hope you find a sense of comfort in these words that pour out of me, in these words that write themselves. I hope you realize I’m just as broken, just as tired, just as confused, just as much of a work in progress. But just as whole. We’re still so whole, even when we’re lost.
So I hope you stop fighting—the universe, the beating of your heart, the natural tendency within you to share what you have with others, to be free. I hope you dig within yourself, play with the messy pieces, make friends with the demons, get your hands dirty on the journey to finding you.
Don’t give me any of that fakeness, of that temporary, of that ‘here for the moment’ and gone when I open my eyes. I’m worth more than that. You’re worth more than that.
This life means more than that.
So I hope you stop kidding yourself.
I hope you get authentic.
I hope you chase real.