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Just Because Someone Loves You Doesn’t Mean You Should Trust Them

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The more you grow up, the wider your network becomes. You meet more people, you make new friends, you get closer to more colleagues and you date more so you tend to have a clearer perspective on people and the importance of setting boundaries.

I’m not saying that everyone you meet is shady but sometimes the people you meet later in your life can easily fool you into believing they’re someone else because you don’t know much about who they really were. It’s not like the friends you grew up with that you can trust blindly with your life.

When you trust someone you don’t know that well just because they seem to care about you, you’re more susceptible to disappointment because you don’t know for sure what this person will do with that information. Will they use it against you? Will they link it to a weakness you have and take advantage of you? Will they tell other people who shouldn’t know? Will they have your back or will they stab you in it?

Because people love you but they love themselves more. They care more about their image. They care more about their reputation and they’ll do whatever it takes to protect it even if it means throwing you under the bus.

I’m starting to realize that love and trust are not synonymous anymore. That just because someone loves you doesn’t mean you should trust them with your deepest secrets no matter how vulnerable you really are.

Because when everything is back to normal, people will not remember your vulnerable moments, they’ll remember what you said during these moments.

I’m starting to learn that people remember weaknesses more than strengths. They remember what brings you down more than what lifts you up.

Maybe we’re all just wired that way but the only way to prevent it is to protect ourselves from anyone who could use our weaknesses against us.

Protect your secrets. Protect your heart. Protect your emotions. Protect your insecurities.

Share only what you don’t mind losing. Love everyone but be careful with who you trust because even the ones who love you can’t always be trusted to be there for you when you need them.

Trust yourself above anyone else. Be your own best friend. Show off your strengths but keep your weaknesses to yourself.

Don’t let people in too much because sometimes they leave before you’re ready and it’s because you had too much faith in them and you trusted them before they truly earned your trust. TC mark

Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.

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