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1. Some people find their confidence in feeling better than others. Some find their confidence in helping others feel better. You will see a significant change in your quality of life when you spend more time with the latter.
2. People radiate what they are. You can determine a lot about someone’s character by how you feel when you’re around them.
3. Your brain is conditioned by your tribe. You become the sum of what you surround yourself with. You’ve probably heard the adage that the 5 people you spend the most time with have an incredible impact on who you’ll be. Wasting away your weekends with people who are only bringing you down is not a benign activity.
4. People who inspire you to be better are usually people who are working on making themselves better.
5. People who want to work on themselves are humble enough to know that they have flaws, yet confident enough to know that they can change them.
6. People who want to better themselves are people you can be honest with. They respond to criticism with compassion. They go out of their way to improve your relationship together. They are willing to change because they are not attached to already being perfect.
7. People tend to act from their identity. If your relationships require you to be a certain type of person, you tend to make choices that align with the group’s thinking, not necessarily your own best interest.
8. When you’re with the right people, you love who you are when you’re with them as much as you love who they are when you’re together.
9. When you spend time with people who are positive and motivated, you tend to not bond over mutual disinterest or dislike. When your relationship revolves around you complaining together, you sink each other into a pit of negativity.
10. You should spend time with people whose success reminds you of what’s possible, rather than threatens what you already fear is not.
11. When you spend time with people who love you more than they want to fix you, you start making more kind and loving choices for yourself that ultimately alter the problems you needed to “fix” in the first place.
12. You shouldn’t take advice from anyone you wouldn’t want to switch places with.
13. When you spend your time with people who inspire you to be better, you have fun for the sake of fun, not fun for the sake of coping or avoiding pain.
14. People who are working on themselves tend to be more self-aware than average. This makes for some of the best friendships, because they don’t project or externalize control.
15. You should leave hangouts feeling inspired to keep working on your life, not defeated because you’re not good enough to fit in yet.
16. Your tribe will find you not when you want them, but when you are like them. The best part about surrounding yourself with people who are motivating is that you are equally inspiring to them. If your “people” aren’t here yet, it’s probably because you’re not “there” yet.
17. When you spend time with people who are successful, you start to reprogram your subconscious mind to assume success is possible.
18. When you spend time with people who self-sabotage or cling to a victim-mindset, you start to subconsciously condition yourself to believe that being successful = bad (because it will incur the jealousy or aggression of your inner circle).
19. Your sphere of influence is how you make most lasting change in your life. Friendship, even when not professional, is a form of networking. As you widen your circle in the right direction, the more opportunities become available to you – without you even having to try.
20. Nobody is perfect. Everyone can at least try to do better. Friends that remind us of this when we most need it are our most invaluable assets.