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I don’t need a handsome face. I need a handsome heart. I don’t need someone with six pack abs. But I need someone who works on his emotions just as much as he works on himself in other ways. I don’t want perfection. I don’t want someone who is unbreakable. I need someone real.
I’m only 24. I’m young. But I’ve come to find quiet a few things about love.
I’ve realized that you can never make someone love you. Or even like you. You aren’t going to be the most liked person ever in the world. You’re never going to be able to be please everybody. Life is too short to try to do that. So focus on yourself. Focus on your goals and on your well being. Only then can you open yourself up to love.
I’ve been single for a long time. I’ve had periods of times where I didn’t go on a single date. I’ve had periods of times where I didn’t go out. I’ve also had times where I wanted to meet every boy I swiped yes to on Tinder. And I’ve had periods of times spent with quite lovely guys. I’ve been smitten. I’ve been brave. But, I’ve also been broken by one too many almost relationships.
I finally love being on my own. After years of not feeling fulfilled without being in love. I love not having to worry about someone else. I love not having to care. But I also miss it. I miss falling so hard and being caught. I miss the sweet moments you can only experience with a significant other. I miss caring. I miss loving.
The guy I will wait for has to have a kind heart. That’s all I want at this point. A kind human being.
I don’t need the fancy gestures. I don’t need the fancy dates. I don’t need the rose petals. I don’t need the door opened for me. I don’t need the male model. I don’t need the bay watch lifeguard. I don’t need the hottest guy in the club.
Love isn’t perfect. So how could I expect the next man I fall for to be?
My 2018 resolution is to open myself up to love again. To not be so scared of rejection and heartache like I have done in the past. Sure, I might get hurt. I might get wrecked. I might get blindsided. But without those learning experiences, I won’t ever get to find love again.
And maybe I’ll find him this year. This man I have imagined up in my head. This man that is sweet to me. That doesn’t hurt me. That doesn’t change his mind.
Maybe I’ll finally find someone who doesn’t leave.
Just like they all do.